


Collar Full

by FrostedHolly



Category: Naruto
Genre: Awkward Romance, Boys Being Boys, Boys Kissing, Cuddling, Emotional Baggage, Feels, Fluff, Getting Together, I promise, Late Night Writing, M/M, Some Humor, Uchiha Obito Lives, and really clueless, its really sweet, kakashi's here to help, kind of, obitos an emotional disaster, thats basically the endgame here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:13:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26226205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrostedHolly/pseuds/FrostedHolly
Summary: This whole thing was Kakashi's idea in the first place. Ever since they returned to Konoha with the allied shinobi forces, he's expressed an interest in this new body of Obito's, and he'd asked to explore it.At the time, Obito didn't have any complaints, but now that it's actually happening, he quickly realizes that he's feelingmorethan a little overwhelmed already.basically obito's not having fun getting used to having feelings again and it's all kakashis fault
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Uchiha Obito
Comments: 16
Kudos: 130





	Collar Full

**Author's Note:**

> hi again ☺️
> 
> so in 2014 or so, my sister got me vol 67 of naruto as a christmas present. i had to have been like 12 lmao. i remember reading through it and not understanding at all what was going on, but one thing was for certain-- i really, really loved obitos character design. 
> 
> so anyways, i wanted to describe the more intimate things a bit awkwardly in this one because its from obitos point of view and I dont think hes really well-versed in how to deal with those kinds of things. he wouldnt know how to explain them himself, so i tried to portray that through the writing without somehow making the whole thing awkward to read. i didnt know if anyone would pick up on that so i decided to explain that here lol hope you enjoy 😘
> 
> side note: the title comes from a panic at the disco song of the same name

Obito hasn't been touched in years.

Well, before the war that took place a few months ago, that had been true. The power of his right eye had allowed him to transport any part of his body to his very own pocket dimension, giving the appearance that he could phase through matter at will. For the longest time, the truth behind his power had remained a secret at large. Until the war, anyone who was lucky enough to unravel the truth— let alone land so much as a punch on him— never lived long enough to tell. 

The only touches he'd felt were accompanied by intense pain and, as if it were second nature, he'd done everything to avoid touches like that. He's almost always been strong enough to fight and eliminate any enemies who threaten him, and he always had an escape if things were getting too risky. He can count on his fingers all the times he's had a hit landed on him. He'd been good at it. 

Which is why he's currently about to lose his mind.

Kakashi's sitting on his lap with his legs bent on either side of Obito's thighs, as if trying to cage him in. His hands— soft, delicate things that fascinate Obito— are hovering over his bluish-white skin, so close but just barely not there. So close, in fact, that he can feel the other's body heat radiating from his palms. They somehow still don't meet, not even when Obito's chest moves as his lungs fill and expand. 

His eyes flick up to Kakashi when he senses the hesitation that's keeping those unsullied hands away, and it only takes a moment for dark grey orbs to meet his own, "you're sure this is okay?"

This whole thing was Kakashi's idea in the first place. Ever since they returned to Konoha with the allied shinobi forces, the silver-haired man had expressed an interest in this new body of Obito's. He's always payed attention to the new additions on Obito's body, from the horn-like appendages on his head and around his collar to the robe thing that splits from his pectorals and goes around his back. Even the tomoe-shaped prints on his back and across his chest as well as the organized patterns on the right side of his body are a source of interest to him, and he'd asked to explore it all with Obito. At the time, he didn't have any complaints, but now that it's happening, he quickly realizes that he's feeling _more_ than a little overwhelmed already.

It's not exactly the weight on his lap that has him reacting this way— after all, it was this same man who escaped the kamui dimension right above him, kneeling down on his waist with a kunai to his neck, ready to land a killing blow only a few months ago— but he doesn't want to rule it out. Usually, he has an answer to everything, from sticky situations to simple problems. Today though, he's grasping at straws; he's unsure, confused, and maybe even a little nervous. 

He rakes his mind in a desperate kind of fervor to reach some kind of conclusion, to answer this troubling series of questions. When he comes up with nothing, he just speaks without thinking about it any further— a harsh lesson he's learned throughout his time assimilating back into society. 

"Yeah, go ahead. You can touch."

Even then, Kakashi still seems hesitant, as if hearing Obito's troubling thoughts. He sends one last glance up at Obito, which prompts him to nod. At that, Kakashi's hands descend onto his chest.

Obito hadn't been too ecstatic at the idea of being poked and prodded like a caged zoo animal— in fact, he still isn't. According to the Yamanaka interrogator that searched through his mind and was left speechless and distant, Obito's in a rather unstable state of mind. He's even got chakra seals on the insides of his wrists and ankles because of that woman.

Any skin-to-skin contact that isn't aimed to kill is contact Obito generally doesn't want to partake in. He hasn't had this in so long that, when Kakashi proposed this idea, he'd almost ran off. Seriously— he'd almost left the house to rush to the Hokage's office and ask for the longest mission to be assigned on, chakra seals and all. He doesn't quite remember _how_ casual touches are supposed to feel, and he's scared to find out, but he's not going to run from it and let anyone know he's anything less than confident, because he's prideful like that.

Now, as he feels light fingers touch and press on his skin, Obito finds himself rather _underwhelmed._ The touch isn't anything like he'd thought it would be; it's not painful, it's not addicting, it's not alluring nor is it appalling. It's just... there. It's simple.

_It's fine._

Kakashi's hands travel from Obito's midsection to the symmetrical appendages around his collar, and he wonders why he was so frightened in the first place. He doesn't know what it was exactly that made this idea so unappealing— the man who'd asked is one of the only people left that Obito can say he trusts wholly. Kakashi's unmarred fingers play gently on the surface of his skin, casting small tingles and a sense of good intentions through him. Nothing more.

Until they wander to the edges and the point of the flesh.

That little move sends shockwaves of _something_ through his body, from the tips of his ears down to his feet. He shivers, and there's an unusual warmth at his cheeks. Like a lit candle with the scent of _pink sands._ His heart beats sporadically in embarrassment, and he pretends that such a small insignificant touch _didn't_ have such a huge impact on him. Though, by the way Kakashi's hands stutter and repeat the motion, he's already picked up on it.

Obito shivers again. His face positively burns, and he waits until he calms down a bit before he speaks. "That feels weird," he mutters, "the hell did you just do?"

Kakashi makes a thoughtful sound, movement slowed and focused in a trance. He trails his fingertips along the junctures where the appendages meet Obito's chest in featherlight touches, "I'm not too sure. Good weird or bad weird?"

Another question that Obito's frustrated to realize he doesn't have the answer to.

"I—" Obito gets distracted by the graceful movement of the younger's pale lithe fingers along his skin, "I don't know."

Kakashi doesn't have an answer to that. Instead, he simply continues to move his fingers, exploring the expanse of new skin.

How is this _real?_ How can something so simple do such complicated things to his mind? Perhaps he's touch starved— the last time he's been touched so intimately like this, he'd been about thirteen years old, and he's now in his late twenties. Touch is something he never thought he'd miss until now. In fact, it's something he'd never really thought about to begin with. Not after Madara, at least. There had been more important things to spend his time thinking about.

Madara's plan had been very appealing to him back when he was a little younger. After the incident with Rin and the Kiri ninja, Obito had understood Madara's ramblings from beforehand. The old man had stated that this reality is hell, and a huge part of Obito had resonated with that. He, in his naïvety, had chased after Madara's dreamworld. He'd thought that _everyone_ wanted to live in such a world, they just didn't know they wanted it yet. He'd been fully content with making them realize it.

It gave him a sense of purpose. A feeling he'd never quite gotten in Konoha— at least, not in such a high magnitude. Having that sense of purpose had made him stronger; where he'd been clumsy, he became balanced, fear had turned into confidence, and ignorance had shifted into natural talent. He'd applied himself in ways he never before thought he was capable of. He'd detached himself from the world and almost all emotion— including infatuation and the longing for intimacy— in order to carry out that plan.

When he became old enough to finally start questioning himself and his actions, he'd already killed hundreds of men. He was in far too deep to back out. Then, years later, when he'd been the closest he'd ever been to reaching his entire life's dream— the dreamworld— he'd been shot down and told that everything he'd done up to that point was _wrong._

It had been terribly difficult to understand that, let alone come to terms with it. Being defeated in such a way had brought back a plethora of memories, emotions, and feelings he thought he'd long since forgotten. The hardest thing to adjust to, however, is dealing with being human again. Compared to that, this new body of his is _nothing._

"Do you think these are made of bone, or cartilage?"

Kakashi's calm, almost sultry voice is a welcome distraction from Obito's spiraling thoughts. He doesn't remember what Kakashi said, but he refocuses his eyes from somewhere behind the other man to the hands on his chest.

"Wait, what'd you say?" His voice comes off a little more shaky than he intended it to be.

"Do you think the're made of bone or cartilage?" Kakashi repeats, pointedly walking two fingers along the length of the one just below his left collarbone. The shiver that comes with that is more intense than the last two. He wishes he'd tried harder to hide his response, because Kakashi sends him a look that's nothing short of teasing.

Teasing, or something akin to it. Perhaps a little softer. It's getting difficult for Obito to differentiate these things.

"I'm not sure. Probably cartilage though," he mutters, and closes his eyes as Kakashi lifts his right arm to the horn-like addition above Obito's temple. He feels his own muscles relax at that, and lets out a small sigh at the _kind of_ pleasant sensation, "if I had to guess."

He doesn't notice Kakashi's amused huff when he leans into the touch. The attention that Kakashi gives the area is quite nice— it's unlike anything he's ever felt before. As Kakashi's hands run along the length, Obito knows he doesn't want it to stop, and for a while, it doesn't. His shoulders fall and he lets out another soft, almost inaudible breath.

"So this is good, I take it?" Kakashi's smooth voice rings out again, and it sounds as if it came from deep within his chest, quiet but demanding Obito's attention all at once. Obito fumbles for a response, his head foggy and his heart pounding. His lungs fill and deflate slowly, making it easy for him to speak without having to worry about his voice failing him.

Even with that, all that comes out is a whisper of, "I— _yeah._ "

Kakashi's pretty laugh sounds again, and Obito doesn't miss it this time. He's glad that he doesn't, because it's the only human-like thing he's witnessed today that doesn't throw him for a loop. It makes his heart do funny things from the confines of his ribcage, and he's suddenly far more aware of the weight on his lap. 

One thing Obito hates more than anything is losing control. He's almost always been able to gain and maintain control, and the few times he's lost it, it never spelled anything good. When he lost control of _Nagato_ , and of the _war_ he started, things didn't end up too well— though, he could probably find himself content with the last one.

He's losing control of the situation. That control rests in the hands currently playing at his head and around his abdomen. It's getting hard to remain still with his hands at his sides, and he doesn't like it one bit.

He suffers through the new sensations being given to him by the shorter man for just a few moments more before deciding: _To hell with this._

Obito grabs Kakashi by the waist and shifts, bringing Kakashi with him as the man gives a startled sound. The copy-nin lands with his back to the couch and Obito on top of him. Obito props his arms and legs on the ouside of Kakashi's form, and suddenly, it's _him_ caging _Kakashi_ in. He stares at the man under him, who has his hands on Obito's shoulders and his brows raised in surprise. Or shock, because Obito still can't tell the difference. 

When Kakashi's eyes glaze over with something new and his knee bumps up into the inside of Obito's thigh, he realizes that not even in this position is he in control. He's not even in complete control of his own body. His heart is pounding in his chest, his breathing comes fast and shallow, and he can't think clearly, he can't _think—_

"Obito."

Obito blinks as his panic clears. Kakashi slides a hand over to rest at the nape of his neck, thumb trailing along his jawline, "hey, you alright?"

 _No,_ Obito wants to say, because he really isn't. 

What comes out is a shaky breath as he lowers his head to rest on Kakashi's chest, knees and arms still propped up. Even this motion sends that foreign feeling throughout his body. It's in this moment that it begins to dawn on him that he feels closest to home here, in _this_ position with _this_ man— this annoying, insufferable, lovable man— his closest friend. He doesn't know why he's feeling this way. He's so _confused._

He hates having to deal with these feelings. He's just not used to them, and all they serve to do is frustrate him. He's sick and tired of being _confused._

"Obito, look at me."

He feels the words come out from Kakashi's chest, the gentle vibrations disruptive to his line of thought. He raises his head to meet Kakashi's eyes, and is surprised to see the other man's mask pulled down around his collar. 

Here comes that new feeling again. This time, it's more like a head-rush, stunning him frozen for a moment, but then the moment's gone and he can take the sight in. Kakashi's the splitting image of his late father, a nicely shaped nose for his well-defined jawline, with a beauty mark on the lower left side of his face. Obito can only blink. He's rendered speechless. 

He's never seen Kakashi's face before. It's remained a mystery to him for the past twenty-some years. He remembers being on Team Minato back when they were kids, and a lot of the time he was around the other boy, he'd be wondering what was so worth hiding that Kakashi felt it necessary to wear a mask at all times. To him, it had been the world's greatest mystery and, at times, the secret of life.

He'll never ask. He doesn't need to know, and it's not his place to know. Even as a child he had respected that. He huffs out a breath of amusement, because some things haven't really changed.

"What are you thinking?" Kakashi continues, and Obito is reminded that the other had begun talking just a minute ago. He's looking at him with the same expression as before, but to Obito, it's a lot more open this time around. He can even see a small smile playing at the corner of his friend's lips. Just barely noticeable, but it's there nonetheless. 

"I don't know," immediately escapes Obito's slightly chapped lips in something barely above a whisper, and he realizes that he can't look away from the lazy eyes of the man under him. It's almost as if they _captivate_ him.

"Hm, don't know why I didn't expect that," Kakashi teases, and Obito watches from his peripherals the way those pretty pink lips shape around the words, "there can't be much going on in there, seeing as it's so hollow."

Obito chooses to ignore that. It’s definitely _not_ that he didn’t hear it because he’s a little too blind sighted by all of these new things happening to him.

He loses every ounce of self control he has as he moves down to bring thier foreheads together, and is momentarily pleased to learn that the horn-like structures don't get in the way of that. They breathe in each other's breaths until Obito feels soft lips press against his own. 

Wait.

Kakashi's kissing him.

It takes him a long second to process that. When he does, though, he hesitantly presses into it, moving his arm so that it's propped up and rested on the armrest above Kakashi's head, using his free hand to rest it on the side of Kakashi's face. At that, Kakashi makes a pleased sound in the back of his throat and slings his arms around Obito's neck, pressing him closer. Obito finds the contact to be wonderful and warm, grounding him. Making sure he doesn't run away.

Under all the shock and nervousness, this feels right to him somehow.

All too soon, Kakashi loosens his arms around him by a fraction and Obito pulls away. They press their heads back together again as they catch their breath, and he feels the strangest pang in his chest. He's left wondering why that nice fluttering feeling escaped him.

The next few moments that pass by feel like forever, and he's reminded why he's not cut out for things like this. What if he was bad at it? What if that was a mistake? What if he was too eager? What if the hands around his neck were there to tell him to stop? 

"Obito," he doesn't have time to start to regret it because of the way Kakashi's soft, breathless voice tears him away from his doubts. He feels a hand being placed on top of his own over Kakashi's cheek, "was that okay?" 

Obito raises his head so that he can look the other properly in the eye, only a few inches apart. That warm feeling starts to return, even through the unpleasant one that just reared its head. These different emotions are running rampant inside him, making it hard to think over the perplexity, "I think so..? I can't..."

He struggles to put the words together, but Kakashi's worried— or concerned— expression beneath him teaches him how to.

"I can't make any sense of these feelings I have," he says, and it's so quiet that he doesn't know how Kakashi can hear him, but he does, "I don't know how to get them under control."

Kakashi brings his own hand up from Obito's hand to his cheek, and the contact strengthens the pressure-like feeling in the pit of his stomach. These feelings that have all of a sudden shown up— he doesn't know what to make of them. Kakashi smiles when he seems to recognize Obito's lack of certainty, and runs his fingers along his cheekbone. Obito finds his eyes fluttering closed.

"Tell me what you're feeling. Describe it to me."

Obito stills. He blinks his eyes back open, stunned in disbelief. How in the hell is he supposed to do that when he doesn't even understand them himself? He clears his throat, even though there's nothing there, "I don't know how."

Kakashi hums, hand going up towards Obito's temple, "then, do you want me to help you?"

Obito doesn't linger on the feeling for too long, trying to focus on their conversation, "you have these feelings too?" 

The man under him only nods, wrapping his arm back around Obito's neck, tightening them to nudge Obito closer, which he responds to hesitantly. Their lips meet for a second time, and Obito's pleased to feel himself not fumbling as much. He remembers how the last one was— slow, sweet but still inexperienced on his part— and tries to fix his mistakes. He still lets Kakashi take the lead, but he's not pliant. He leans into it, and there's a pain in his chest that tells him that this _isn't enough._

This feeling won't go away, even as he tries to focus on the kiss. He's just not close enough, why is this not enough—

In his turmoil, he pulls away, burying his head in the area between Kakashi's neck and shoulder. He feels the younger man move his hands from Obito's jawline to his biceps, squeezing gently before trailing one down his spine in a beautiful spark of goosebumps. The motion is deliciously torturous, because he's so tired of not being used to this feeling. It makes him almost want to scream.

"You don't have to understand them," Kakashi begins, fingers drawing pretty patterns along his back, making Obito exhale, "or control them." 

"But they feel so terrible. That hardly helped at _all._ "

"That's because you're not used to them."

 _That_ gets Obito's attention, "so you're saying I _will_ get used to them?"

"No, probably not." 

Obito huffs, and Kakashi snorts, "I've dealt with these feelings since I was about nine years old. I'm still not used to them."

Obito's far too scared of the implications in that sentence to reply. He'd met Kakashi when the other had been exactly that age. He's stunned to silence. There's no _way_ this man is implying that—

"That's what makes us human, though," Kakashi takes the silence as a signal to continue, and adds lightly, "and that's what makes life worth living. To me, at least." 

Obito’s nose wrinkles. He doesn't understand how these emotions can possibly be the spice of life like Kakashi describes when he'd went on for so long without them. He hates having to get accustomed to them, and it baffles him that his younger self lived with this each and every day. And so strongly, too— he doesn't like to remember much from his past, but he's always remembered that he was a particularly emotional kid. How he did it, he'll never know. He's just more used to running away from everything that makes him _Obito,_ including all of his emotions and all of his issues. 

Now that he's been forced to face them, he's had to face them all at once. He's still not done getting past them. They're like brick walls in his mind that he runs into every time he thinks about them. Ignoring all of his past attempts, turning a blind eye to the blood there at the base of the wall. He keeps making the same mistakes, and because of it, he's never going to be able to get through with processing the fact that he's allowed to have these things. Regret is human nature. Sadness is human nature. _Love_ is human nature. These things are not his forte.

Being here, though, looking at Kakashi lying under him, just barely keeping themselves put together, helps him realize that making the same mistakes is fine— normal, even. Kakashi might not have the same problems as him, but he has his own things to go through, just like Obito does. That thought makes him feel less alone, and he doesn't know at what point in time that having company began to give him comfort. Solitude had been his throne, not so long ago. He had been fine being on his own, and he was fine having people stay so far away from him. 

Now that he has Kakashi, he thinks that they can _share_ in their respective sadness. He won't ever have to deal with anything on his own anymore, and that means more than everything to him.

He pushes forward again, meeting Kakashi in a slow yet searing kiss. He feels the smaller man hum, and the hands on his shoulder and back tighten for a moment before continuing their movements, although a little less graceful. He brings a hand down to snake it between Kakashi and the couch, resting at the small of his back. He nudges Kakashi to press onto him, but Kakashi only wraps his legs around Obito and pulls him down in one quick movement that has Obito breathless. He gasps into the kiss, and feels Kakashi smile through it. 

Obito's still terribly lost. He's not sure if any of what he's doing is right. It's an understatement to say he's inexperienced— he's never partaken in anything like this, nor has he really witnessed it either— but it seems like Kakashi's really enjoying it. He was certainly never taught, but maybe he can learn from the other.

He's grateful that, if anything, he's doing this with someone he's known his whole life.

When Obito pulls away, he falls to rest his whole weight on top of Kakashi. They're both out of breath again, so they take a moment to regain their composure. He presses his cheek to the left side of the younger shinobi's chest, hearing and _feeling_ the erratic heartbeat under the layers of skin and flesh and muscle, and feeling the rise and fall of his quickened breathing, almost in tune with his own. He feels his heart pumping in his chest, his breaths coming in and out of his lungs, and he hasn't felt this alive in a long, long time.

"Obito, you're heavy. I can't breathe!" Kakashi laughs from above him, and Obito lavishes in the way his chest and shoulders shake with it. The life radiating from him, the humanity of laughing so brightly, replaces those burning waves with a warmer and softer feeling. He can think over this one, and he's so grateful for that.

"I'm _one_ inch taller than you, there's no way I'm _that_ heavy." Obito remarks, only a little affronted. To that, Kakashi snorts and playfully pulls at his hair. 

"Usually you brag about that one inch, though."

Obito uses the hand on Kakashi's chest to swat at him, bristling, "shut up, Bakashi!"

Kakashi only laughs again, full and unfiltered, and Obito loses what little fighting spirit he had for that small argument. As Kakashi calms down, Obito chuckles, lying on top of him comfortably. He allows himself this; to be happy, to relish in this big part of the human experience he's gone so long without. To feel the lazy weight of Kakashi's arms around his back and the hand petting through his hair. To have his hands on Kakashi's shoulder and his chest. To be content.

He knows this feeling won't be around all the time, but he wants to be certain that it'll always come back. He's taken a liking to it, and he wants to take it along with all of the other strange, scary, and even painful feelings. Just as long as he has this one.

"Do you think we can make this work?"

"Hm?" Kakashi hums distractedly, fingers working through Obito's white hair in a hypnotic pattern that has his limbs feeling heavier than before. His other hand starts tracing nonsensical patterns along the dip of his back, and he almost forgets to repeat himself. He has to force himself to speak.

"Us. Do you think we can make this work, between us?"

He's so hesitant to clarify himself. Throughout his whole life, this has been the only man who ever really believed in him. After Minato had told him the story of Sakumo Hatake, he had realized that Kakashi was so hard on him because he truly believed Obito could be better, and he genuinely cared about both him _and_ Rin, even if he wouldn't have admitted it. He still believed in him when Obito had turned out to be the man who singlehandedly started the fourth great war, saying the joyful, compassionate kid he once knew was still alive. At the end of the day, it had been one of the very few things that saved him. 

He'd spent his whole life trying to lose that connection, and now that he has it back, forefront in his mind, he realizes how _ignorant_ he had been. Maybe he never had to in the first place, because through everything that transpired between them, Kakashi’s still here. 

"Yeah," Kakashi says, voice heavy with a soft kind of determination, "we've basically been through hell and back, and we still ended up right here. So, I don't see why not."

Obito allows a smile to tug at his lips. He eases into the sensations on his scalp and his back, closing his eyes in relaxation. If Kakashi thinks they can really do this together, then he thinks the same. If they can't, then Obito will find a way to _make_ it work. He wants this— to feel content next to this man for as long as whatever god watching over them will allow. 

"Thank you, Kakashi."

He hears Kakashi make a questioning noise, but it blends into the background as Obito loses focus. He doesn't respond, just continues to relax in the other man's embrace, and he feels almost close enough. 

He's fine with settling for the small distance that's still there. He has time to walk it later, and maybe getting serious about adapting to being human again isn't so bad for along the way.

**Author's Note:**

> so uh theres that 😎
> 
> what inspired this one is the fact that not enough attention is put on obitos juubi form. i just wanted to give it some love even if there was some kakaobi along the way 🌝 i wrote this one about two years ago and it was bad but the idea was really solid so today i rewrote it and here we are. hope my hard work entertained at least someone lol
> 
> also it would be cute if you would tell me if theres any typos bc its really late and i seriously havent gotten sleep in the past 30 or so hours. also I have a dentists appointment tomorrow so writing this was a way to calm myself down lmao


End file.
